Unit 22 Hitting the Wall

Hit the wall, hit the wall, hit the wall completely! Let it happen as early as possible!

I used to speak often about ‘hitting the wall, hitting the wall, hitting the wall completely’; however, what do you really understand about ‘hitting the wall’?

You ‘want to obtain shinjin’ and so make efforts to listen to the Dharma (chomon) for many tens of years, but you still fail to obtain shinjin. We say the nembutsu (nien-fo) yet we are unable to feel assurance of our birth in the Pure Land. What is the matter? Even though we have listened to the Buddha Dharma and pondered it, still we are unable to resolve the problem. This is what ‘hitting the wall’ means.

The person who had never ‘hit the wall’ would not be able to see the moon of the Primal Vow-Power.

Being trapped between impermanence (death) and stupidity, powerlessness and evil, you find yourself caught on the horns of dilemma and are totally lost without help. This is called ‘hitting the wall’.

A person truly ‘hits the wall’ at the time of death. At the time of death, his eyes see no sight; his ears hear no sounds. This is the ‘total darkness’. Because the craving of human life has come to an end, it is ‘completely hopeless’. Even if a person is without a religion, he or she still lives in fear of death; therefore it is a ‘complete horror’. Even the westerners also describe death as ‘the king of horror’. Further, when it comes to time of death, one will feel very lonely; this is called ‘complete solitude’. This moment will come upon everyone sooner or later.

At the bottom of great doubt lies great awakening. The person who has not truly ‘hit the wall’ will never experience an overwhelming feeling of ‘joyful faith’.

Hit the wall, hit the wall, hit the wall of saying the nembutsu, the Primal Vow-Power.

Hit the wall, hit the wall, hit the wall of shinjin, the Primal Vow-Power.

Hit the wall, hit the wall, hit the wall completely! The path that opens to us is the Primal Vow-Power.

For the person who has not ‘hit the wall’, no matter how much you have spoken, it is like fixing the lock on tofu, like hammering the nail in the husk.

The sequel to fifty years of dilemma is to be able to see the path of the Primal Vow-Power.

To the person who has never been in a quandary —who has never ‘hit the wall’ —regardless of how much Buddha Dharma he has listened to, it is of no avail. You have to walk the path until you cannot make any more progress and ‘hit the wall’ in order to break through.

The mind to accept shinjin reverently is no more.

Shinjin cannot be acquired, only the consequence of falling into hell.

'It is not something that you can obtain', 'acquiring shinjin is still impossible', 'accepting reverently is still impossible'… Then you will hear inconceivably the calling sound:

'Come at once single-heartedly with right mindfulness!'

This sound of great compassion, of great character, will transmit to you.

To the extent that 'no matter what you do you will not acquire shinjin', you will be accepted and taken in by ‘How could I let you fall down? If you fall down, let's see!'

'When its energy is spent,

the frog is fished out,

croaking aloud!'

Zuiken Sama